I was talking to my friend Andrea today who is a new mommy with a brand-new son named Koston, born on June 24th:
He has his hands together, very deep in thought!
Isn't he handsome? Yeah I know.  She was telling me about her "new-mom" Paranoia this morning. . .how she will stare at him during the night in his bassinet.  And when her husband moves the bassinet to his side so that she doesn't stare, she'll pretend to be going to the bathroom and she'll go to the other side of the bed and stare at him some more.  You know, making sure your baby is breathing, sleeping comfy and etc.  They are little miracles so it's totally natural to stare!

I went home thinking about my daughter and an incident earlier in the week.  Brooklyn usually wakes up around 6:30 and at the latest she will sleep until 7:30 (good times).  But one morning in the week the time kept passing, and Ryan and I continued to look at each other and say "she's still sleeping?!".  So as I was taking advantage of the moment by getting dressed and ready for the day-Paranoia set in!

-She never sleeps this late. . .
-Am I sure that she's sleeping. . .
-What if she's laying there feeling alone and not crying. . .
-Is she stuck somehow in her crib. . .
-What if she quit breathing. . .

My best friend tragically lost a baby brother to SIDS, and it makes my heart sad to know that bad things can happen to these sweet, little, precious babies.  I was reminded that Paranoia is probably not something that goes away.  Brooklyn woke up at 8:30, but now I get worried when she falls over on the tile -"does she have a concussion?", and when we're driving -"what if we get hit?".  Yeah,  I sound like a crazy person. . . but I bet most moms do, since there is always something to worry about!

Thankfully, our God is bigger than Paranoia.  I have to give my paranoia, worries and fears to Him because I can't handle them on my own-even with the help of my hubby:)

"When I am afraid, I will trust in you.
In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid."
-Psalm 56:4

*Head to the American SIDS Institute to learn more about SIDS, find resources for families and consider making a donation towards research and projects!


  1. Love this! Thanks for posting :) Our God is bigger than all things!

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