7.04.2012

What She's Missing

I have a baby book that allowed me to mark down dates for all of Brooklyn's milestones that she reached.  At two months old she smiled, when she was 4 months old she found her feet and at 11 months she would wave and say "bah".  Those are just a few things that I marked down, but now at 20 months old, she changes so much that I don't even remember to write stuff down because I'm too busy playing and trying to be present in her life.

On May 31st was the court hearing for Baby "G".  From the information that CPS had collected and what I was told by the Parent Aide, mom was cleared.  Baby "G"'s injury was an accident, and not even that, mom wasn't EVEN THERE when it happened.  Baby "G" showed no signs of permanent damage or previous abuse, and all of the specialists who came to our home cleared him to be perfectly healthy. 

Because of this accident and CPS taking "G" into custody, I couldn't help feeling sad for his mom while I watched him reach milestones in my home.  I would never tell her that I saw it first, and would let everything be new to her eyes, wanting her to think that he only reached the next developmental stage in front of her! 

In four months "G" pulled up to standing, started walking from furniture to furniture holding on, started clapping and pointing, stood alone without holding on and now has taken up to five or six steps on his own.  He did this all for the first time in our care.  I get tears in my eyes thinking about a Foster Mom watching my daughter change because of an accident that had me fighting for her custody, fighting to prove that I was a good mother and could care for my daughter.

So on May 30th I was filled with joy knowing that "G"'s momma was innocent, that CPS had nothing against her and I was told that they actually wanted to settle out of court which usually means they have no case.  I packed up all of his clothes that belonged to him, with a few extra outfits from the Senters, and was preparing to hand him off so that he could finally be back with his mom. .. which is what should be the ultimate goal of a Foster parent.

We have a busy summer working in youth ministry so Ryan and I decided that we would take about a two month break again.  This would give us time to go to church camps without worrying about respite care, allow us to go on vacation and let us have some special time with Miss B before accepting our fourth placement.  I was making plans in my mind and looking forward to the easy life of one child again.

On the day of the trial I was anxiously waiting to hear what happened.  Baby "G"'s mom told me that she would call afterwards, but she never did.   Instead I received a call from CPS letting me know that someone had dropped the ball on bringing all of the appropriate information to trial, and the judge PUSHED the trial dates to July 9th and 24th. 

My summer plans had changed, but that thought only briefly crossed through my mind.  I couldn't stop thinking about "G"'s mom.  How she would have to wait another month, maybe even a month and a half to have her son back home.  I started thinking about all of the milestones that he might reach between now and then.  So I made a quick decision, and invited his mom and her kids over to the house to see Baby "G" that weekend.

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